And then I would carry that on through the sales letter … instead of your stupid, you R stupid (kind of like Toys R Us)

Uh. Are you sincere in wanting to sell this site to women also? IMO, it will not only not appeal to women, but I found a lot of it downright offensive.

Especially the Jennah Jameeson testimonial. Too many woman are exploited in the sex trade for this to be funny. Any women that make it this far, will bail when they see that.

(And yes, I know that the whole thing is tongue in cheek and meant to take a shot at IM in general … it’s still offensive.)

At the top of the sales letter you say … read this letter before you make a fool of yourself and then …

a few lines down after the order button, berate the reader for reading more.

This is not my type of sales letter. I don’t like the Rich Jerk type of marketing.

So in my opinion, this is not going to appeal to women. (known in your copy as chicks, babes, etc … all terms that will have self-respecting women hitting the backbutton asap).

Women may read it out of curiosity (like watching a train wreck), but the offer would have to be really compelling for me to buy. And, I would probably *not* buy just on principle .. nothing personal, I jsut don’t like the Rich Jerk type of marketing.

Graphics are definately leaning to men. Dark colors and first impressions is it looks like blood splattered. Overall a dark and violent feel for the graphics — much more masculine than feminine appeal. (Very well done by the way.)

Now, all of that said … it looks like you’re appealing to a certain demographic — young males — and the graphic and copy seems to be well-optimized for them.

Remember the saying you can’t make all the people happy all the time …

IMO, you should ask yourself if women are really your market on this product and what percentage of your market they represent.

In other words, if your target market is young males, then why water down your sales copy to grab a smaller part of the market?

However, for the bigger picture, while tone and graphics do probably appeal to your market I don’t think you are clear about the benefits of the product. There is no compelling offer or reason to buy.

I’m left at the end of the letter now knowing what I’m buying or how it is going to help me. You need to hammer your prospect over the head with the benefits. In fact, I would pay less attention to the stupid factor in your headline and clearly outline what’s in it for the buyer. What problem are you solving? Is it throwing money away on products that don’t work .. making gurus rich and you (stupid) poor? Or that gurus count on opportunity seekers … always buying products and not putting them into action (again, stupid)?

BTW, if you do that effectively for your target market, then the occasional woman is going to buy just b/c the product will also meet her needs.

Hope this helps,
Kate

You are obviously targeting an audience that either:

1. Likes to be abused.
2. Thinks being insulted is funny.
3. Are just curious about this stupidity.

Here are my thoughts in general:

- I think the benefit is missing. The whole above-the-fold area is dedicated to calling me stupid..

Have a look at the The Rich Jerk site…he starts with a benefit and you don’t have to scroll down to find it. Personally, I’d give them some reason to keep reading right away and make sure they don’t have to scroll to find it. The site looks cool, but the header and graphical elements take up so much space.

The way this is set up, I’m not sure you’ll have people reading on for more…but I could be wrong!

- I am not sure what you’re trying to get at it here. I don’t think I’m humorless, but if the site is a joke, I don’t really get the humor. If you can tell me the purpose, I’d be happy to give more feeback.